5 am

i wake myself uncomfortable in the sofa, not because of the cold or of the rudeness of one’s movements, but because of the lack of air provided to my chest as I remember the words of my father today.
He did not say anything exceptionally important, you know? Just the usual stuff related to basic needs and how the call was being so cheap and how he could call all the time without spending too much.
It’s something very funny, the premises in which we base our relationships with people we love. The one I have reserved for my father is spaceless car. It has no walls or ceiling – and I guess this ties in with the fact that most serious conversations we’ve had took place in cars in many different geographic locations. Guess genetics is fucked up, I like cars, not new of fast or pretty cars, but any car that still moves, because it has the ability to move me from one place to the other bringing whoever I want with me.
I once heard my mother say that my dad was an eternally dissatisfied man. I did not agree with her at the time and that was probably because of the intonation she gave to the statement. But now, not only I corroborate that opinion, I say yeah, me too. And I am so proud of it, because even though it hurts to be like that sometimes, if you really try to solve your endless dissatisfaction, you get happy so many times more. Same with orgasms, if you keep on you can have five. That’s what happens when your limit is a bit further. you probably reach longer distances and seize different horizons.
But this is just me after a bad dream. Most times I am just a regular minded person.

5 am